Sunday, April 1, 2012

Day 34: Nerd games and PDA

Day 34: Apr 1, 2012.


I went swimming today. There was one other couple in the pool, and they were up to some fairly kinky stuff. It annoyed the hell out of me. Don't get me wrong, I don't have a problem with PDA per se, each one's free to do as they please, I guess. The thing is, I was scarred when, as a child, I saw a Caucasian couple my grandparents age at it in the pool back home. I was doing some underwater swimming, and I promise, I wish I didn't see what I did.
Really, really, scarring.
In any case, even outside of pools, I've always hated it because it makes me feel miserable and lonely. Especially on escalators and in queues when the most natural thing to do is to look in front of you, and then you feel like a voyeur. Euch.


Sethi introduced me to a game today, and for all the language nerds out there, this is an obscene amount of fun. I can't really explain what the game is, you'll just have to see what we came up with yourself.
Here's what got us started.
And these are what we came up with; three of them are Sethi's, the rest are mine. If you can think of any more at all, please comment.  So exciting!


(1) "I didn't get nominated for a second term", she said, disappointed.

(2) "She borrowed my mink coat" I whispered furtively.

(3) "Game on" she whispered playfully.

(4) "We're out of water" he remarked dryly.

(5) "You missed a full stop right there" he said afterwords.

(6) "I'm too tired to undress," he said wearily.

(7) "I forgot to wear anything underneath", she said negligently.

(8)  "I left my trousers in her room!" he panted.

(9) "I can't wait to start the book!" he said, readily.

(10) "You'll need adhesive for the wood" was his reply.

If you missed the joke in any of them, comment saying so, and I'll highlight the relevant bit. This really is a lot of fun.

SV.



87 comments:

  1. "We must always turn the other cheek", he repeated, half-assedly.

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  2. "I have to go to the washroom", he told his peers

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  3. "I don't like this chicken", he said gingerly
    "I don't like this chicken", he said sheepishly

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  4. "Manmohan Singh spoke in the Lok Sabha", he informed absurdly
    "I shall not stand the smell of James Bond", he said spinosely

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    Replies
    1. I shared the Manmohan with my friends here, it had us in splits for a fair amount of time =)

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  5. "Give me a call at nine", he said callously.

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  6. "I'm at the bookstore", he paged his wife.

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  7. "Wait! Its coming", ejaculated Dr.Watson.

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  8. Shrey Goyal was having technical issues posting, here are his swifties:

    "Let me have a look at your fountain head," she said, objectively

    "My grandfather smuggled the watch from Poland," he cracked.

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  9. "My stomach feels much better now", he said after winding down.

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  10. "Shocking behavior, passing wind in public!" remarked the woman disgustedly.

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  11. "I wish I could hold out a little bit longer", he said, prematurely.

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  12. "I like my women tight," said the enterprising gentleman.

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  13. Replies
    1. My dad would've made this one, yayyy

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    2. Shrey Goyal: (technical issues again)

      ..." said Sneha coldly.

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  14. "I am shopping for my girlfriend," he whispered

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    Replies
    1. I usually stay free of such dangerous territory.

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    2. Both Sethi and I came up with stuff based on those exact lines, but chose to be classy.
      Thank you then, for breaking THAT ice.

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  15. "I can't give it π Volts!", jolted the irrational electrician.

    "How about three, to the RF circuit?", the academic said with a natural air.

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    Replies
    1. "That should be good", said the grounded electrician.

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    2. Omg I understood this one! Yay!

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  16. "I hate CAPTCHAs," he said, while trying to choose from 'gitbrie witbrarn' and 'gitbrie witbram'

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  17. "Don't you just love that Zach Levi!" he chuckled

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  19. "I wonder if there's a pharmacy open at this hour," he said, neither condemning nor condoning her concern

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  20. "…and this is what I get for years and years of loyalty!" he barked

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  21. "I'm so lonely", said she, with cloudy eyes.

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  22. "The master, not the slave!", he overtly exclaimed.

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  23. "You've been a bad, bad boy," she sade

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    Replies
    1. Didn't get this one, it isn't a song she sang, is it?

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    2. I think this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marquis_de_Sade

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    3. very cool!

      Although, I think it's pronounced saad...

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  24. "I sell soap for a living", he told himself dreamily.

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  25. "I thought the text would look neater this way," she justified

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  26. "Do you think omlettes are sexy?" she sizzled.

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  27. "Where are all the pretty ladies!" exclaimed I when I went abroad.

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  28. Here's one keeping the blog title in mind:

    "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn", gabbled the butler

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  29. ".... and that's the last of the seven", he remarked filthily.

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  30. "It is 9 inches long!", she ruled.

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  31. "And with triple word score, that's 108 points for me!" she quipped

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  32. "I thought he lived in apartment number 404", he said erroneously

    "The Mig 35 is better in every aspect", he remarked plainly.

    "How about a game of cricket?", he asked silently.

    "And one last one before I go to sleep", he said ultimately :) :)

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  33. "I never quite understood it fully, can someone please explain what it really meant", he asked ravenously.

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  34. 'You can warm yourself by the fire', he said coldly.

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  35. "He died last year" she mentioned in the passing.

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  36. 1. The clumsy maidservant had just left, when my friend drew nearer and whispered, let bygones be bygones.

    2. Being free speech activists, we are urging the great man to not charge us for his appearance, she continued.

    3. Differing opinions are encouraged in our magazine,and that too just outside its pages.

    4. Where else would you find such an abundance of rhetoric, she grinned.

    5. I admit, I was distracted by her button, threatening to come undone; it was a cliffhanger, really.

    6. Well, I said, (trying not to stare) if the comedian doesn't turn up, nobody will get the punchline.

    7. Stop worrying, she slurred, alcohol on her breath; I'm almost drunk on the possibilities.

    8. You have to stop being the writer so often, she lectured, grabbing my collar, and actually write for us.

    9. Seeing my future employment on the line, I think I was up for pretty much anything which included the word "job."

    10. I have just one condition, nothing official, I assured her, I just need to know if my office would be next to hers.

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  37. "Check out this game, you'll get a real kick out of it", Sethi told me asininely...

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  38. "What was your impression of that painting's worth.", he asked monetarily.

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  39. Continuing on the art theme, Mithilesh contributes this:

    "Any plans for the sunday afternoon other than lazing around on the island", he asked pointedly

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  40. "There's no such thing as a joint effort Sethi", I said rolling in laughter.

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  41. "Wouldn't you rather have some cake?", she asked her guests merrily.

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  43. Definitely the least refined among all the attempts:
    "Why does everyone keep taking my case", said Mrs Lele, first name Mary.

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  44. "Do you know who's the guy who keeps pissing off our headmaster", he asked harriedly.

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  45. Had to improvise...

    "Why do you keep splitting the infinitives up", he said fascistically.

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  46. "The game would be fun, they said," they said.
    "Thats what she said," thats what she told me.

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  47. "I like to think I'm a Grammar Nazi" he said, heiling a cab.

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  48. "Where do I pick it up?", she said, floored by the gift.

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